


The Weight of Water

by The Miss Paramount (Hanamuraki)



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Car Accidents, Hospitalization, I Made Myself Cry, M/M, Memories, Near Death, Persona 5 Spoilers, ambulance, description of medical procedures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:20:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27612674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hanamuraki/pseuds/The%20Miss%20Paramount
Summary: After the collision, there is always stuff to remember. Who knows if there will be an after to tell.For every two attempts writing happy stuff, there must be a piece of angst. Day 3 of Maruki Week 2020.Unlike the last two pieces, this one doesn't happen within the same storyline as Drive Me, Crazy.
Relationships: Hasegawa Zenkichi/Maruki Takuto
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8
Collections: Maruki Week 2020





	The Weight of Water

_Once you have loved someone this much_  
_You doubt it could fade_  
_Despite how much you'd like it to_  
_God how you'd like it, you'd like it to fade_

\- Franz Ferdinand "Fade Together"

Takuto didn’t realize the moment of the collision. 

He was happily chatting about recently moving in with his partner and helping on some projects at a local school with the taxi driver when that happened. The collision happened so quickly it barely even hurt, he lost consciousness a few seconds after as a response to his body being so hurt.

_ “Mrs. Maruki, Takuto-kun fell from a tree, I think he broke his arm, please come help him.” _

Takuto heard voices around him. The autumn trees looked beautiful and the leaves were falling around him and the rest of the children who surrounded him. He felt no pain until someone moved him. Then he was aware of his own screams and the pain blinded him. 

He cried a lot.

After returning home with his arm on a cast, he remembered seeing a small, injured bird from his window. While he was not allowed to leave the house because of his injured arm, he quickly rushed to the garden to rescue the bird. He found a small dish and put some pieces of bread in it to feed it. 

After a couple of days, he noticed that the bird was slowly fading away.

When it died, he clinged to his mother as he wept silently for it. Why wasn’t he able to save it? Why did he have the possibility to heal and the bird didn’t? He had poured his heart and soul to save it and yet, he was about to bury it.

_ “You don’t always have to save everyone, Takuto.” _

The pain he didn’t feel initially was raging inside him. He promised to himself to help those who needed him.

But the pain, at that moment, was too much for him to handle. 

He never realized the moment of the collision.

***

Captain Zenkichi Hasegawa hated being on call during Friday nights. Most of the cases were about drunk people refusing to pay their bills at bars. 

_ “Captain Hasegawa, we got a report of an accident close to the station. Emergency services are on their way there. One of the victims was reported dead on the scene, we need to head there for the coroner’s report.” _

“Alright, alright, I will be there.” Zenkichi huffed, annoyed. He was pretty sure that it was another irresponsible drunk driver. He got in the car and drove a couple of blocks away from the station. The scene was impossible to describe. 

He could hear the loud sirens from the ambulances. One of the vehicles was completely upside down and the other, a larger truck suffered some damage but unlike the passengers inside the taxi, the driver was unharmed.

“Captain Hasegawa, the paramedics assessed the truck driver and cleared him to go to the station… but we’re going to need help identifying the other two in the other car… You may want to take a look.” The officer looked distraught and the color was drained from his face. 

Zenkichi approached the car and immediately noticed that the taxi driver was dead, there was no doubt about it. 

Then his heart nearly stopped. 

Takuto was the other passenger. Then it dawned on him, he was probably going to the station to meet him. He was wearing a nice black suit that was now covered with small glass shards and blood. 

He looked at his watch. It was 9:35, Takuto was supposed to meet him at 10:00.

Terrified, his shaky hand reached across the car and touched Takuto’s neck, trying to find a pulse.

His heart nearly stopped again when Takuto opened his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Oh god, there is a survivor… we need to get him out! We need to…”

Some of the police officers pulled Zenkichi back as the paramedics began to work on getting Takuto out.

“Captain Hasegawa… Do you know him?”

“He is… he is my partner. Maruki Takuto.” 

“Sir. Captain, we’re unsure if we can take him out without causing him further damage. Consider the possibility… that he may not make it.”

“If you’re telling me to get ready to say my goodbyes, I won’t.” Zenkichi said. His voice didn’t quiver. “This is an order.”

It was an hour past midnight until they were able to get Takuto out. He was in bad shape and was barely conscious. The paramedics took him to the ambulance to try to stabilize him. With great sorrow, Zenkichi saw them cut through the suit and his shirt, exposing his chest.

“We’ll be lucky if he makes it to the hospital alive, Captain…” One of the paramedics said. “We don’t know what the extent of his injuries are yet…”

“Well, you’re going to make sure he makes it there alive.” Zenkichi’s cold rage was present as he enunciated each one of the words. He looked at Takuto. “That goes for you, too.”

The ambulance ride was faster and much more difficult to handle than Zenkichi could ever imagine.

Takuto’s eyes flew open occasionally, he was clearly distressed and in pain. The tears and the sweat on his cheeks made it hard for the oxygen mask to stay in place. His body was strapped to the stretcher and he couldn’t move even if he wanted it. He didn’t try. Every time the ambulance hit a speed bump or a stone on the uneven pavement, Takuto would moan in pain, unable to make a coherent sentence.

Then the monitor gave way to one loud, constant beep. One of the paramedics pushed Zenkichi back to the wall as she reached for the defibrillator. Words like “start the compressions” and “clear” got to Zenkichi’s and Takuto’s ears indifferently.

_ The victims were found by their daughter, Rumi. Afterwards, she was reported to be hospitalized in a seemingly catatonic state. As of today, the Tokyo police haven't been able to catch the culprits. _

Hospitals.

White and sterile.

Takuto held Rumi’s hand on his and would tell her about his days with all the details. He then hopelessly offered snacks to her, thinking about what she would like the most. Her eyes were fixed on the wall and they wouldn’t look at Takuto at all. She didn’t seem to be aware that Takuto was there at all or that he looked more tired than ever.

Hospitals.

Noisy and silent.

She was so unresponsive that she was hooked to a monitor constantly. The doctors had to sedate her to make her sleep as she wouldn’t stop staring blankly at the wall. There was a young man who visited her every day and would try to feed her snacks.

Until one day, he mentioned his family. They had caught the culprits.

Hospitals.

Peaceful and chaotic. 

He would never come back after that.

After the fourth attempt at resuscitating him, the paramedics had already lost hope. With a weak but steady beeping, Takuto was brought to life. His brown eyes opened again.

“Zen…”

“It’s okay, don’t talk, we’ll be there soon…” Zenkichi was crying, he could notice, but he didn’t have his glasses on. The pain was evident now. 

Then it all dissolved in a flurry of darkness.

_ Hello! My name is Maruki Takuto, I will be supporting a local organization here in Kyoto. Pleased to meet you. _

Zenkichi looked at him. The man had black hair and almond-shaped brown eyes and smiled gently in a way that reminded him of Aoi. He looked happy and peaceful. Zenkichi felt as if he was lying on a wildflower field when he saw him. 

They talked for a few hours before he agreed to go out with him..

Then a few weeks after, he introduced him to Akane, his daughter, and she was as enthralled as he was with Takuto. 

Three months after he moved from Tokyo, Takuto was a complete success in Kyoto. His kind demeanor and comforting words of advice were usually all it took for him to easily win over anyone.

Now he was dying.

They barely made it to the hospital. Zenkichi wanted to go inside the trauma room with him but the paramedics held him back. They didn’t know if he would make it.

Hospitals.

So chaotic and full.

Flower fields.

He remembered putting some flowers on Takuto’s hair as the golden sunbeams illuminated his young face. His smile was more luminous than the sun itself when he heard Zenkichi say “I love you.”

_ Rumi, I'm so close...so close to fulfilling my promise. In fact, I'll promise you again, here and now: I will create the perfect world for you. _

The words still resonated in his mind but it had been a while since they no longer made sense to Takuto, as he held Zenkichi’s hand. He hadn’t forgotten about Rumi, but her memory didn’t hurt like a poisoned blade inside his heart. In the end, she had parted ways with him and he was now  _ happy _ .

Zenkichi was diametrically different from Rumi. Where she had been loving and tender, Zenkichi was loving but more intense. Ravenous like a wolf in his love. Protective. For the first time in years, Takuto felt he had a home with someone.

He hadn’t forgotten about the promise he had made to Rumi.

But the best he could do to honor that promise was making the world better by other means.

_ “Captain Hasegawa, we have assessed the extent of his injuries and if he makes it through the night, we will operate on him… but you may want to sign this.” _

_ “What is it?”  _

_ “It’s a DNR form, if we attempt to resuscitate him once more we might risk brain damage and even more damage to his heart.” _

_ “I’m not signing this. Do what you want. I can’t sign this. Not for him. He has a lot of fight left in him.” _

_ “Captain Hasegawa, it might be the most humane thing to let him go if he codes again.” _

_ “NO! You hear me?! I will fight with him till his very last breath. There is no way I’m signing that shit.” _

Zenkichi hit the wall. He wasn’t prone to those rage attacks anymore but the plain and simple suggestion that Takuto may cease to exist was enough for him to break down. A younger police officer tried to hold him down.

“Can I at least see him?”

“Just for five minutes.”

There were a myriad of cables attached to Takuto’s body. The beeping from the monitor was constant and reassured him that he was still fighting. There was a tube coming out from his mouth, helping him breathe. 

“Takuto, remember us. Please don’t go yet.”

The tears came out easily. He didn’t mind that the people outside saw him crying.

“Come on… We have so many places to go. Remember you said you wanted to go to the beach so you could see me wearing something that’s not a suit?”

He reached for his hand.

“Please, Takuto… don’t go. You can still do it. You can remember, can you? How our first date went terribly because I left you waiting for hours and yet you refused to go home?”

There are some things that you recover from and some things that you don’t.

_ “The future. Look at the bright future in front of you, Ren. You can still have him and be with him.” _

_ “I don’t want this, he doesn’t want this, not like this!” _

Ren Amamiya was in front of him, fighting with all his heart. He hated to admit it, but he was the better man. Despite the fact that this will mean he will lose more than Akechi, who he clearly loved dearly, he was still fighting. 

The fact that Ren followed him to the bottoms of the deepest of his heart meant that he wanted to fight for his justice, even if that meant losing everything. 

Ren, bloodied and beaten up, still emerged victorious. He had nothing left.

_ I’m going to say goodbye to him, even if it takes all I have. _

Takuto’s heart stopped for a second time in front of Zenkichi. He dropped to the floor the second that the doctors ran into the unit. He couldn’t bear seeing how they tried to revive Takuto a second time that night. He couldn’t imagine how much it hurt to have one’s heart defibrillated.

“Please save him… please save him…” He was alternating between prayers and cursing. His mind was racing. He tried to escape and he wanted to write everything he wanted to tell Takuto, in the event he agreed to marry him in a not so distant future. “Please don’t let him go…”

He tried to run away and write all that he couldn’t yell at Takuto, but you don’t write down declarations of love.

_ “Okay, we’ll go to the beach but only if you buy a swimsuit as ridiculous as Yusuke’s. We’ll go to Okinawa and we’ll have a hotel room with a balcony by the sea! And then I will…” _

_ “Then what?” _

_ “I will swim out with you.” _

_ “I’m not sure that’s what you wanted to say, but I will just go with it.” _

Takuto was pretty sure that what Zenkichi meant was “I will ask you to marry me” but neither one was ready to take the step. The balcony by the sea sounded great. Lying on the wildflower field felt like being in the ocean, so peaceful, with the weight of water covering them like a blanket. 

Despite the fact Zenkichi stood him up for more than a couple of times, he was a perfect date. Takuto was sure he loved him. It was not hard to imagine more of these peaceful afternoons, walking to the field and then back home. The grass tickled his toes and Zenkichi made funny faces because of the pollen.

It was not hard imagining a future in which they would simply fade together after living long lives.

Zenkichi made it easy to imagine a future together.

It was 3:35 AM when they were able to bring Takuto back.

Zenkichi broke down crying and reached out to hold his hand.

After all, it was not difficult to imagine a future with Zenkichi.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you SO MUCH for keeping up with me during this challenge. You can also find me as @HiMissSycamore on Twitter!


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